I spent a few days with Mom, Dad, Grandma, cousin Chris and Neill up at my Grandma’s Cottage in Wautoma, WI this weekend. Did a lot of sleeping, a little drinking, some relaxing, and a LOT of fishing. Neill hadn’t been fishing since he was 8, so Dad did he best at teaching Neill the ropes. After mastering the “tree cast” (meaning, he would cast straight into a tree), Neill went on to the “cast as far as I can cast,” and was quite the pro by the end of the weekend. Wasn’t quite warm enough to go skiing, but it was a great weekend to relax. Unfortunately, I did manage to get some wicked form of strep throat or something, but I guess that’s the price I pay.

The picture above isn’t quite accurate, by the way. Neill is holding MY fish. I caught the biggest fish.

That’s it. My team is doomed. No, it’s not what you think. I didn’t LOSE to Tripp last week. My team isn’t THAT bad. But I did tie him. Yes, that’s right. I tied with the last-place team. No good can come of this…

It looks like it is going to be an uphill battle to getting back into 1st place in the league. Jim’s Ass has been tearing apart the league and Spooners isn’t too far behind. I’m going to need everyone else’s help in the league to help get those two out of the top spots!!

1. Jim’s Ass (Jim–last week, #1): 65-28-3
2. Spooners!!! (Tulsa–last week, #2): 54-36-6
3. Shen Beets (Tara–last week, #3): 50-42-4
4. Police Chief Wiggum (Babe–last week, #4): 46-45-5
5. glove compartment (Jeremy–last week, #6): 46-46-2
6. Barely Know Her (Tim–last week, #5): 45-49-4
7. Barons (Niti–last week, #7): 31-59-6
8. Who’s On First? (Tripp–last week, #8): 28-60-8

Maybe I can do a little better this week and beat the 7th place Barons. Or maybe I’ll just keep getting lower and lower in the league. Time will tell…

Words cannot express my excitement when I received my subscription to the Business Journal in the mail today and the headline was:

IKEA likes Milwaukee

In the words of Joey Tribbiani, YEA THEY DO!!

Unfortunately they don’t have the article online, so I can’t link to it, but the basics are that IKEA has hired a Milwaukee real estate company to find a site in the Milwaukee area so they can build a 215,000 sq ft store. Giddy up!

“Ikea is interested in the Milwaukee area because of the many southeastern Wisconsin residents who frequent the company’s store in Schaumburg, Ill… the Schaumburg store, which is about 300,000 square feet and three stories tall, “is exploding” with business.”

They listed a bunch of different locations that they are looking at, including “a site between downtown Milwaukee and west along Interstate 94,” the former Northridge Mall side (although IKEA says that is not centrally located enough), the Park East corridore, Menomonee Valley, Wauwatosa, Oak Creek and Franklin. They also suggested Pabst Farms in Oconomowoc.

Needless to say, it will be nice to be able to go to IKEA whenever I want, instead of having to make the big trek down to Chicago to check out the store.

Last night pitted the 1st place team, Sparky’s, versus us, who were in 2nd place and boy, did we have a rough night. We had what looked like a powerful lineup, with the addition of Babe and only batting 10 people, but a powerful lineup doesn’t mean anything if we can’t string together a few hits. And we couldn’t do that to save our lives last night. Not to mention that our defense was less than stellar AND their pitching was really good. Thus, a 10-19 loss to Sparkys, dropping us to 2-2 on the year. The score makes it look closer than it really was, but hey… anything to save a little face.

For the season, that puts our batting average at .500. Let’s try and raise that next week when we play at Sijan Field on June 1st at 7:00pm.

I was flipping through the channels on TV last night when I came across a channel I had never seen before.

Fox Reality.

I remember hearing talks about having an all-reality channel, but I never thought that anything came of it. I only caught an hour-long episode of COPS, which included a man in a kilt singing country songs and mooning people driving by, but I like the idea of the channel. I’m a sucker for reality shows, so it would be my ideal channel. The unfortunate part is that it is run by Fox–meaning that the only shows that they can air are FOX shows. So, no Survivor, no Bachelor, and no Apprentice.

FOX Reality is only running on DirecTV right now, so I don’t know how long it is going to last, but I think I’ll keep tuning in for a while…

Sorry for the lack of posts, all. I was in Green Bay for the past few days for work, so I haven’t had time to update things.

The good news though is that I redeemed myself last week and got a very important win in fantasy baseball! I got an 8-4 win over Jeremy’s glove compartment. That put together with Babe’s 3-9 loss bumped me back up into 3rd place. So, watch out, jim…. I’m coming!

1. Jim’s Ass (Jim–last week, #1): 54-27-3
2. Spooners!!! (Tulsa–last week, #2): 45-33-6
3. Shen Beets (Tara–last week, #4): 44-36-4
4. Police Chief Wiggum (Babe–last week, #3): 41-38-5
5. Barely Know Her (Tim–last week, #6): 42-40-2
6. glove compartment (Jeremy–last week, #5): 39-41-4
7. Barons (Niti–last week, #7): 30-48-6
8. Who’s On First? (Tripp–last week, #8): 22-54-8

Tripp. Listen. Niti doesn’t even look at his team… AND HE’S BEATING YOU!!! 30 games out of 1st place is hard to come back from… just ask the Brewers. With that said, I’m playing you this week, Tripp. So, start winning NEXT week.

I think I’ve found a picture of the ugliest cat EVER.

His hair is nappy, his nose has 3 holes, his eyes are deformed and, as Neill said, it looks like he has had too much chewing tobacco.

Yikes.

After being rained out last week, Club G’s came back and won our game last night, 9-4, vs. Childrens Family. Like Coach Z said, “Our defense was flawless and our offense was good enough! The infield was awesome tonight!” And he was right. Our offense came in spurts. It didn’t help that their pitcher was really good and didn’t walk anyone, but we pulled out 9 runs, so no complaints. I went 1-3, but my one hit was a double, and a solid double at that, so I’m happy with my performance. Now if only I could do that every time. Stats for the week are below.

And after 3 games, some congrats out to people…

Come join us next week Wednesday, May 25th, for a 9pm game at Sijan Field. We’re playing a team that has been perennially good–Sparkys, so we need all the fan support we can get!

I can’t believe it. Ever since I’ve been tailgating at Miller Park/County Stadium, I’ve been doing it illegally!

An article on jsonline.com today explains that due to a city ordinance, it has been illegal since 1980 to drink while tailgating.

Ordinance 106-2.1, which was passed in 1980, is the one we’ve been blissfully ignoring out there. It says it shall be unlawful for anyone to drink the strong stuff in public parking lots or parking structures. The fine is $50 to $250, probably depending on how much abuse is heaped on the arresting officer.

Milwaukee Police took over security at Miller Park this year… through that process, they found out about this ordinance. The good news is that the police aren’t being aholes about it.

Ald. Michael Murphy, who represents the Miller Park area, said he was approached in March by a police sergeant who had looked into the law.

“You know, we’ll have to ticket people out there,” the sergeant said.

“I don’t think that would be a wise course of action,” Murphy replied, clearly recognizing political suicide when he hears it.

Ok, I don’t know who that sergeant was, but you KNOW he was the kid in class with you in grade school or that annoying coworker of yours that always has to be the one that was right or the tattletale that has to get everyone in trouble. Good idea, sarge… ticket the over a million people that are tailgating every year. That will get people to come to the games.

Good news is that the The Common Council is expected to vote Friday to correct the embarrassing oversight and make drinking legal in the parking lots of Miller Park during sporting events and concerts. Phew.

GO CREW!!

Thanks to Bonnie for giving me the heads up on this one:

Toads are exploding in Hamburg, Germany, and scientists can’t figure out why.

That’s right–exploding toads.

I could hardly believe what I saw,” Smolnik told the Telegraph. “Dozens of toads were crawling out of the water. They were puffed up to almost three times their normal size and making strange screeching noises. Then they just started popping. Some just went ‘phut!’… but others literally exploded.”

I guess this is all happening in one pond in Hamburg. And it doesn’t happen 24/7–it only happens between 2am-3am. And did I mention that this is the peak of their mating season?

They’ve tested the water, and it’s fine. And there aren’t any fish or ducks or anything else that is exploding… besides these toads. Some scientists think that crows attacked the toads, and while the toads survived, the crows had ate too much of their innards and that’s what caused them to explode.

Sounds a little fishy to me. I think that someone is putting TNT inside these toads’ bellys. What do you think?

I am in all sorts of trouble.

I told you last week–my first drop from 1st to 2nd place was the beginning of the end. I enjoyed sitting atop of the league for 4 weeks, but I think it’s finally time that I take my annual place at the bottom of the league. I made a big step towards that this week, with a 2-9 loss to 1st place Jim’s Ass. It dropped me from 2nd to 4th place, and now I am 8 games back from the lead.

Time to start overhauling the team, I do believe. Here are the standings as of today.

1. Jim’s Ass (Jim–last week, #1): 45-25-2
2. Spooners!!! (Tulsa–last week, #4): 40-27-5
3. Police Chief Wiggum (Babe–last week, #4): 38-29-5
4. Shen Beets (Tara–last week, #2): 36-32-4
5. glove compartment (Jeremy–last week, #3): 35-33-4
6. Barely Know Her (Tim–last week, #6): 33-37-2
7. Barons (Niti–last week, #7): 24-43-5
8. Who’s On First? (Tripp–last week, #8): 20-45-7

Well, the good news is that Jeremy and I are falling just as fast as Bonnie falls off a bar stool. I’m not alone. Spooner had the big jump from #4 to #2 this week… solidifying the fact that beginners get all the luck.

And thank you, Tripp, for hanging on to that last place with a pathetic 1-10 loss last week. Have you give up on the season yet?

I think I found Steve’s impostor on yahoo today. You be the judge.

Steve	Impostor

THIS is why you shouldn’t get random disposable cameras developed.

I did it though, and these pictures are what I have to show from it. Lots of St. Patty’s Day pictures and some of Jamie’s return to Wisconsin. (Ladies, if any of you want doubles, let me know…)

Last summer, I posted about Denny’s Beer Barrel Pub in Pennsylvania, who started offering a 6lb burger. To put that into perspective, let me remind you of what Kelly’s Bleachers in Milwaukee offers:

For those of you that live in the Milwaukee area, I’m sure a lot of you have been to Kelly’s Bleachers on Bluemound, also known as the home of the 4 pound hamburger. I can’t find a picture of it anywhere, but that is a bigass burger. To put that in perspective, think of a good-sized steak being around 16 ounces. This is 64 ounces. Very impressive if anyone has consumed one of those.

So, Denny’s come out with the 6lb burger. THEN, Denny’s loses the title of “world’s biggest burger” to the Clinton Station Diner in Clinton, N.J., which introduced a 12.5-pound hamburger called “Zeus” in early 2005.

Denny’s has reclaimed the crown though by unveiling the “Beer Barrel Belly Buster” a monstrous 15-pound burger featuring:

The burger costs $30, and could feed a family of 10.

Over the weekend, four men took the challenge, but couldn’t get through the entire burger. They opted for doggie bags, instead.

“It’s a little too much for me to handle,” said Steve Hepburn, of Clearfield. “It’s like trying to eat half a cow.”

I don’t have a picture of this burger yet, but when I do, I’ll be sure to add it. You can check out my last article (including pictures) by clicking here. Would any of you be up to the 15 lb burger challenge?

UPDATE: Here’s the picture of the Burger. That’s just not right.

Free Frosty’s this Weekend!!!

I’m ALL IN!